Breastowulf

They’ve posted a new Rated-R trailer for the new Beowulf movie. Find it here. How you can have a Rated-R trailer for a Rated-PG-13 movie, I don’t quite understand, but I guess it makes no less sense than having Angelina’s digitally scanned breasts in a Beowulf movie to begin with. Don’t worry, they’re covered with digitally produced mud, so it’s like hardly nudity at all. Indeed, given the amount of time the animator must have spent trying different mud textures, adjusting its reflectiveness and bloom, mapping the physics, etc. it’s almost art. And so that you don’t give yourself a headache trying to hit the freeze frame at exactly the right shot to see the art, here you go:


In celebration of these two new additions to the Beowulf corpus, enjoy this quote, taken from a preview/puff piece on the Beowulf video game that will be simultaneously released with the movie this fall.

Some may consider Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings trilogy classic literature, but you have to go quite a ways further back to get to what would be considered lore. In the same mystical, medieval ilk as LotR, but coming from a much more classical period of literature was Beowulf. Emerging from the middle ages and at over 3,000 lines long, Beowulf is the crown jewel of heroic English poetry. So heroic and famous, in fact, that Paramount is teaming up with Rob Zemeckis for a film featuring the hero with the strength of many men.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Karma

    Oh. Dear.

  • andey

    U gay or sumthn? Or a casual drinker?

  • slskenyon

    I only recently heard about the new Beowulf movie, and I certainly don’t have high hopes for it.

  • Gryphon

    Ah, yes, the genre of “lore.” But hey, anything to drive up the enrollments in Old English!

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